Tag: women

Playing the Divorce Hand

From a discussion of an incipient divorce on SocialGalactic:

Son’s wife is definitely going to divorce him. Said they could do 50/50 custody. Son taking Vox’s advice, says he’s not going to play the custody game and argue over every little life decision with her. If she wants her “freedom,” he wants full custody, if she won’t give it to him, then she can have full custody and responsibility for the two kids 24/7/365. Says she was shocked to hear it, thinking she was going to have a nice set up. Says she’ll take full custody then. I think she thinks he’s bluffing.

My wife is aghast that he’s taken this position, but I agree it’s the right course. His wife can’t manage without him pitching in considerably. No way she’s going to do it without him in the picture helping out, working full time, and trapped at home every night as the kids sleep. She has no local support network. Even if she goes through with taking full custody, I can’t see her keeping it.

It’s a brutal and difficult decision, but it is the right one in the situation of a wife-driven divorce. Given the way the legal deck is stacked against men in the USA, she will have de facto full custody regardless of what the court-ordered custody structure is, only she will also have effective practical control of him as well.

This all-or-nothing approach leaves him a mostly free agent who has room to operate when she slips up somehow or tires of bearing the sole burden of single parenthood, as she probably will. A positive outcome is absolutely not guaranteed, but the probability of one is in his favor given what is known of her character.

The fact that she was shocked is good. It means she never even contemplated what is now the most likely outcome. And the possibility of turning all the responsibility for the children over to her ex-husband is going to grow more and more tempting to her over time, especially when she wants to pursue men who will be actively dissuaded by her having children.

Son’s wife definitely is not getting it. She made a list of what she wants in the mediation agreement. After listing several household items, she included “100% legal and physical custody” of the children. She then went on to list that visitation will be decided at the beginning of each month, with her getting at least one weekend with the girls. My son is resetting her expectations that she will have them every weekend, all weekend, and every evening as well.

Notice the wife’s incoherent desires and her inability to understand what 100-percent custody means. It’s simply not wise to base one’s strategy on such a creature’s ability to recognize, let alone be reasonable about, the best interests of the children.

As Sun Tzu says, to win, one must know the enemy as well as knowing oneself. This is why Deltas so often lose in situations they could easily win, as they make no effort to understand or anticipate their opposition, but are more concerned about being seen to be doing the right thing. Howeve, the last thing a woman who is ending her marriage in search of fun and freedom wants is to be tied down full-time by her children, with even less time for fun and games than she had when she was married.

It may sound callous and counterintuitive, but the observable fact is that in certain situations, the best way a man can protect his children is by demonstrating that he is willing to walk away from them.

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Spain 1, Lesbianesses 0

Spain won the Women’s World Cup despite its Football Association needing to crush a player revolt by 15 of its top female players by ejecting 12 of them from the national team.

Spain won their first Women’s World Cup final vs. England on Sunday 1-0 but did it without a handful of top players because of an ongoing protest against the Royal Spanish Football Federation.

In September 2022, 15 players sent the federation separate but identical emails asking not to be called up to the national team, citing a lack of professionalism that each player wrote had an “important effect on my emotional state and by extension my health.” They demanded “a clear commitment to a professional project with attention paid to all the aspects needed to get the best performance of this group of players” in the email.

The 15 players were Aitana Bonmati, Mariona Caldentey, Ona Batlle, Patri Guijarro, Mapi Leon, Sandra Panos, Claudia Pina, Lola Gallardo, Ainhoa Moraza, Nerea Eizagirre, Amaiur Sarriegi, Lucia Garcia, Leila Ouahabi, Laia Aleixandri and Andrea Pereira. Three additional players who did not send emails voiced their support for the others: Alexia Putellas, Jennifer Hermoso, and captain Irene Paredes.

According to The Athletic, among the players’ complaints was insufficient preparation for matches, from arriving to host cities too late and traveling by bus when planes would be considered the practical choice. The players also reportedly had issues with several coaches, alleging they were asked them to keep their hotel room doors open until midnight and inspected their bags after they went on excursions during camps. The players never explicitly asked for head coach Jorge Vilda or his coaching staff to be fired, but it was clear the relationship between them was fractured.

Instead of taking the players’ complaints seriously, though, the federation instantly backed Vilda and criticized those who protested. Ana Alvarez, head of women’s soccer at the federation, said that players would need to apologize before they were welcomed back onto the team, and added that “the federation comes first.”

It’s interesting to see how the players revolt – so celebrated in the early stages of the tournament when the team lost 4-0 to Japan in the last round of qualifiers – is being minimized here now that Spain, under the much-vilified Vilda, has won the tournament. Leaving 12 internationals out of the national team in a sport that starts 11 is hardly “a handful”. The media made a lot out of the current players turning their backs on their coach and refusing to celebrate a quarterfinal victory with him, but the observable fact is that there is no way the Spanish team, which had never even reached the quarterfinals before, would have won the World Cup without him.

Female teams are particularly fragile and are much given to self-destructive drama. I doubt it is an accident that Vilda didn’t select 12 of the 15 who initially declared themselves unavailable, as they were troublemakers and drama queens. And it was impressive that he didn’t hesitate to sit down the #1 goalkeeper when she wasn’t playing well, and that he left his star player, arguably the best in the world, on the bench for most of the tournament because she wasn’t 100-percent recovered from injury. Whether they like him or not, his players went on to dominate an English team full of the very sort of troublemakers and drama queens that he ejected from the squad.

A lot of NFL players don’t like Bill Belichick either. But there is no denying he gets the most out of them. Or that he wins championships.

It’s a bit amusing to see some of the bigger names who were left out whining about how they didn’t get the chance to win a World Cup. “What saddens me the most is that I really have to miss out on something when I could have earned it and contributed. It’s a shame.” But it’s not a shame, you didn’t earn it, you didn’t have to miss out, and your contributions were obviously unnecessary.

The lesson of the unexpected Spanish triumph at the Woman’s World Cup is this: the players are never bigger than the team.

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Never Seek the Nonexistent

Because most men are romantics, they struggle to accept the reality that a woman’s love for a man is usually conditional. And quite understandably, being romantics, they discount the observations of any men who tell them otherwise for a variety of reasons that range from accusations of misogyny to serial zifogyny.

It is, however, a little harder to discount the opinion of an intelligent and deeply empathetic woman on the subject. One cannot reasonably accuse Florence Nightengale of hating anyone or lacking observational skills.

In one sense, I do believe I am “like a man,” as Parthe says. But how? In having sympathy. Women crave for being loved, not for loving. They scream out at you for sympathy all day long, they are incapable of giving any in return, for they cannot state a fact accurately to another, nor can that other woman attend to it accurately enough for it to become information. Now is not all this the result of want of sympathy?

I am sick with indignation at what wives and mothers will do of the most shocking selfishness. And people call it all maternal or conjugal affection, and think it pretty to say so. No, no, let each person tell the truth from their own experience.

They really don’t have sympathy or the ability to empathize, because they are always judging everyone and every thing as a product on a social value scale that relates to their own egos and bounces off of themselves. There is no capability for genuine feeling.

This is what I have experienced with women, there is no capability for genuine feeling for other humans, or really in general, except when those feelings are for themselves and the other people are just proxies to bounce ideas off of.

“Women Aren’t Capable of Love”, Florence Nightingale

This doesn’t mean that men shouldn’t pursue marriage or stop loving the beloved, nor does justify the hatred, contempt, and fury so often exhibited by low-status males who are losers in the sexual and marital markets. But it does suggest that most men very much need to modify their basic conceptual models to account for the female tendency toward solipsism and the consequent effects.

UPDATE: A thought for the reactive contrarians to consider: If female love is unconditional, why do men have to earn it and prove themselves worthy of it?

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ESPN Goes Full Feminist

On Thursday night, ESPN will present an all-female version of SportsCenter focusing only on women’s sports. Indeed, the virtue signaling to the left will go all in on the women-only concept because not only will the on-air staff be all female broadcasters, but all the producers, camera people, and other off-air staff will also be an all-female affair, according to Variety. That isn’t all. During commercial breaks and between reports, ESPN will air ads and segments to flog the financial-services firm Ally, which has entered into a sponsorship deal with ESPN owner Disney which calls for 90 percent of its spending on the network to benefit women’s sports reporting.

However, the more exposure to women’s sports one actually has, the less inclined one is to support them, let alone permit one’s daughters to participate in them. It amounts to signing them up for knee surgeries and sexual inversion. It would be interesting to see which path produces statistically worse results on average, women’s team sports or the stripper’s pole.

Regardless, a good father will keep his daughters away from both.

UPDATE: We are reliably informed that ESPN will be following Elon Musk’s lead and rebranding as the Ladies Entertainment and Sports Programming Network.

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Red Flags Waving

This is when a young man really needs to not merely walk away, but run for his life:

HELP I NEED ADVICE. My fiance and I are having lots of issues right now, we can’t stop fighting and I don’t know what to do. I quit my job because wedding planning was taking up so much time, and my fiance is refusing to get a second job. He doesn’t understand that I don’t have time to get ready for work, drive to work, be somewhere else all day, and drive home. I need to be HOME to plan this wedding. I’m trying to find a job from home but it is difficult. I asked him to get a second job and he won’t. It really pisses me off because we are spending $80,000 on this wedding and he keeps saying that we should spend less. UH, HELLO, NO. This is MY WEDDING I have been dreaming of since I was little and I REFUSE to have anything but my dream wedding. How can I convince him to work a second job to pay for this? What happened to “happy wife, happy life”???????????

And if he is foolish enough to fail to heed the giant flashing red lights, he really shouldn’t affect too much surprise when she eventually leaves him because she isn’t happy or because he isn’t maintaining her in the style to which she would like to become accustomed.

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Be Based, Young Man

An interview with Noor bin Ladin:

By turns, Noor blends optimism and pessimism about the future. “I walk through the streets sometimes and think to myself, ‘My God, so many of these people don’t realise the war we’re in.’” But it’s clear enough to me that her attitude is ultimately one of hope for the future. When I suggest that the pandemic response has been a “great filter” event – an event that decides, quite literally, whether people are going to make it or not – and that most people have failed abjectly, she rebuffs me strongly. However many people have accepted events at face value and gone along with what the good doctor Anthony Fauci has told them, enough people are aware of the “war”, and of the stakes involved, that a globalist victory is anything but assured. Despite the reversals of the last year, what she calls the “Great Awakening”, which began five years ago with the election of Donald Trump, is still going strong. “People are fighting back” – look at the protests in France, the Netherlands and even Australia, which people have been far too quick to write off as totally lost, she says. The increasingly desperate measures taken by authorities, especially vaccine mandates, are a clear sign for Noor that things are not going as planned for the globalists.

And, for all the talk of irreligion, decadence and degeneracy over the past hour – however “far removed from God we are”, as she puts it – she trusts, nonetheless, that “we all have an innate sense of morality” and “people know that what is happening is wrong.”

“But whatever happens,” she adds, “God wins at the end of the day.” This seems like a good place for us to end our conversation.

There’s one last thing, though. Given the gravity of everything we’ve talked about – from Auschwitz to xenoestrogens – it feels almost frivolous to ask Noor the burning question, the question that prompted this interview in the first place. But since we’re wrapping up, I think “what the hell?” and ask it anyway.

So what is it based women really want?

“Oh that’s simple,” Noor replies, with a smile. “Based women want a man who’s even more based than they are.”

The sooner both men and women accept that the entire “Enlightenment” program was the nothing more than the continuation of the religious program of the most wicked of the ancient pagan evils, the sooner they will turn back to Jesus Christ, back to the Good, the Beautiful, and the True, and the sooner Man can return to building civilization rather than tearing it down.

If you can’t fight for the Cross, perhaps you can at least summon the faith to fight for flush toilets. If you don’t believe in Rome, perhaps you can at least summon the will to delenda Carthage. If you can’t accept the Truth, perhaps you can see enough of it to reject the Lie.

And it’s a healthy reminder not to hide your intellectual light under a bushel in a futile attempt to avoid female rejection. Instead, give them something to which they can be drawn.

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A Word to the Fearful

Far too many young men are terrified to get married, but their fears are misplaced. I wrote this eight years ago in response to a piece by Rollo, but it’s every bit as relevant today, as it addresses why men have literally nothing to fear from divorce:

You can only control your own behavior. No one else’s. If your wife is unhappy about the choice she made, if her children and friends and family and fun are her priorities and she wants out, then by all means, let her walk! Show her to the door with a smile!

There is a saying: if you love someone, set them free. You can’t control her actions, much less her desires. You can’t control the legal system. You can’t control your feelings. You can’t control anything except your own actions.

Ironically, the more willing you are to let her go, the less likely she is to actually continue down that road. With what is she actually threatening you anyhow? Doing whatever you want to do all the time instead of what she wants you to do? Being able to follow up on any indications of interest expressed by women who are half her age whenever you’re so inclined? Do you genuinely think you’re going to be able to spend LESS of your future income on things you want if she only gets HALF of it?

Do the math. Whether women control 73 percent or 85 percent of the household spending (depending upon which survey you prefer to credit), keeping only half your income amounts to an effective raise between 46 to 70 percent. Effectively tax-free too!

It suddenly doesn’t sound so awful when you put it that way, does it. Remember, most men come out of the divorces that their wives sought happier and better off than they were before. Being around a miserable person who despises you and blames you for their various disappointments in life isn’t a desirable state of being.

Addendom 2023: While it is surely a terrible shock to the system for a man to be informed that his wife has decided to leave him – it’s happened twice in the last year to men with whom I am acquainted – in every single case that I’ve observed over the last 20 years, the abandoned man is a) happier, b) more energized, and c) going on dates with women at least 10 years younger than his ex-wife-to-be within six months of her breaking the news to him.

And let’s face it. In most cases, a woman’s decision to leave her husband is less than a complete surprise to anyone who is paying attention. Angry, unhappy, dissatisfied middle-aged women aren’t exactly famous for their stoicism or keeping their feelings to themselves. It’s not as if the Karen meme appeared on social media ex nihilo.

Divorce is also less common than it was during Peak Boomer. From one-half of ALL marriages, it’s now declined to one-third of ALL marriages, which means that a first marriage now has about a five in six chance of not ending in divorce. Throw in the reduced life expectancy of widespread vaccination, and the odds of staying married until death do you part is probably closer to nine in ten now.

Other than its generally unpleasant nature, the waste of time and money it entails, and the inevitably deleterious effect on the children, divorce really isn’t anything for the average man to fear. So, if you’re a young man who is afraid of marriage due to the perceived dangers of divorce, be aware that you risk missing out on one of the greatest and most important experiences of your life because you’re jumping at shadows.

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A Purge, Long Overdue

They have a long way to go, but the Southern Baptists have finally begun to take their professed faith seriously and clean their house.

The letter in October came as a shock to Linda Barnes Popham, who had been the pastor of Fern Creek Baptist Church in Louisville, Ky., for 30 years, the first woman to lead her congregation. She had served in ministry even longer, since she started as a pianist at age 16.

But now, she read in the letter, officials of the Southern Baptist Convention had received a complaint about her church being led by a woman. The denomination was investigating, it said.

She replied at length, listing her qualifications and her church’s interpretation of the Bible that affirmed her eligibility to lead. Church deacons, including men, rallied to her defense.

Convention officials decided to expel her church anyway, along with four other congregations that have female pastors, including one of the most prominent in the country, Saddleback Church, based in Southern California.

“I never believed this would happen,” Ms. Barnes Popham said of the move to expel her church, as she prepared to appeal the expulsion on Tuesday afternoon before thousands of delegates at the annual S.B.C. convention in New Orleans. “Why would you want to silence the voices of the faithful churches? Why?”

However the delegates vote on her appeal, the larger message is clear: There is a movement in the Southern Baptist Convention, a denomination that is often a bellwether for evangelical America, to purge women from its leadership.

The right wing of the Southern Baptists, the largest Protestant denomination in America, is now — like conservatives more broadly — cracking down on what it sees as dangerous liberal drift.

UPDATE: Members of the Southern Baptist Convention upheld the decision of the Executive Committee to boot Fern Creek Baptist Church from the organization, on a 9,700-806 vote.

It’s about time. The answer to the woman’s question is very straightforward. “Why would you want to silence the voices of the faithful churches?” Because no Christian church led by a woman is faithful. Those voices are satanic.

If women want to start their own equalitarian Goddess-centered pagan religion, they currently have the right to do so in most countries throughout the West. What they don’t have the right to do, what they will never have the right to do no matter what the law asserts, is to elevate their own sensibilities above the Bible or violate the tenets of the Christian faith and still call themselves “Christian”.

These false female pastors should be grateful. If events proceed the way history suggests they will, within 50 years they won’t just be expelled, they’ll be burned at the stake.

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On the Nonexistence of Equality

As I have pointed out again and again, equality is a complete myth. It flat out does not exist, and has never existed, in any capacity whatsoever. And once more, those who purport to believe in the myth underline my observations.

UFC President Dana White should be held accountable for slapping his wife.

Okay, fair enough. It’s not the biggest deal in the world, but domestic abuse should not go unpunished, particularly in the case of public figures caught physically attacking other individuals in public.

White, who is UFC president, was captured on video slapping his wife during a New Year’s Eve party on vacation in Mexico. TMZ released a clip of the incident Monday, and it shows White’s wife, Anne White, slapping him across the face and Dana quickly responding by slapping his wife in the face.

Wait, what? The guy was attacked by his wife, he defended himself by responding in kind without escalating the situation, and therefore he “should be held accountable”. For what, precisely? And shouldn’t Anne White be held accountable for initiating the use of violence as well as her physical abuse of her husband?

The only reasonable conclusion one can reach here is that a) equality is nonexistent and b) the sports media is completely retarded.

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What Christian Men Should Know

A retired and repentant Master of Game provides a list of what he believes Christian men should know about women:

Assume that you will never change her

Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. —Proverbs 31:10-12

It’s a fatal temptation for a man to look at a woman, especially a young one, as a tabula rasa, a blank slate for him to mold into his perfect, traditional wife who bakes cookies and croissants all day. Such a man sees all her flaws and thinks that, with time, he can eradicate them one by one as if using a laser beam. Or he sees her annoying personality traits and thinks that he can dampen them with a sort of punishment-reward stratagem. This is delusion. Who she is is who she is, and if she does change, it will be entirely dependent on her own will and its cooperation with God to serve the good. Any immediate change you do see in her, without much in the way of effort, should be viewed with suspicion.

Do you know how hard it is to change a single behavior, personality trait, or quirk? For example, I have the bad habit of taking the Lord’s name in vain by saying the word “Jeez” as an exclamation. For a couple of months, I have tried mightily to stop using this term, but I have not yet been successful. I have a bad habit of eating past 8pm. I’m grumpy in the mornings. I’m overly sensitive to noise and odors. I prefer socializing only in the evening. I have innumerable preferences that a potential wife may not like and will try to change, but chances are she will fail until I’m enlightened by God to work harder at correction not for my sake but for the sake of the marriage.

Through God’s grace, I’ve been able to step away from sinful behaviors, but the little things that are entrenched into my personality, and which do not pose an immediate risk to my salvation, have remained. This is also the case with women. Do not assume you will change her. Do not assume you can even get her to grow her hair an inch longer than it already is. Do not assume she will change at all. Of course a woman will do many things to please her man, such as to lose a few pounds or dress differently, and she may be motivated to improve for you in a way that she didn’t while single, but don’t expect immediate, permanent change.

Women are capable of deceiving men

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones.
—Proverbs 12:4

The more secular a woman is, the more likely she will set out to deceive a man without ever believing she is being deceptive. How this plays out is that everything will seem to be going well with her while in a romantic relationship, and then one day you are blindsided by her shocking behavior. I wrote books on women, thought I knew them better than myself, but was still badly deceived by them, because as a man, we are not given natural tools to spot every female deception under the sun. There are thousands—perhaps millions of men—who came home one day and stumbled upon a horrible discovery that changed their lives forever. In heartache, they concluded that they never really knew their significant other at all.

It’s possible for a woman to pretend to be someone she is not, sometimes for many years and certainly for the short amount of time needed to put forth a favorable impression and cement a man’s affections during courtship. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Depending on how skilled she is, the lie may be something as minor as a political opinion she’s hiding to not displease you or as serious as living an entirely different lifestyle behind your back. The man who is lusting after a woman will not be able to see through the deception, but a chaste man whose eyes and ears are not tainted by lust should be able to see through any false façade by picking up on inconsistencies in behavior while continually self-checking whether she is “too good to be true.”

At the risk of getting philosophical, I believe that women themselves don’t know when they’re being deceptive or not. Their behavior is subconsciously driven to maximize the rewards received from a man with whom they want to be in a relationship. On the other hand, it is unlikely that a woman is consciously deceiving you if she is open about confessing all her flaws and problems.

Read the whole thing. Roosh definitely knows what he’s talking about, and it well behooves the less experienced man to listen to what he has to say on the subject. Ironically, it’s often the men who are least experienced and least successful with women who are most certain that they understand everything they need to know about the opposite sex.

This is not, in fact, true. The truth is that women are every bit as fallen, every bit as inclined toward evil, as men. It’s only that the way in which their fallen nature expresses itself is different in many ways than the way the fallen nature of man does that oftentimes leads men – even good Christian men – to believe that women are morally superior to men.

Number (9), in particular, is useful.

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