Customer Support Breakthrough

Canada leads the way with an innovative approach to servicing dissatisfied customers:

A paraplegic former member of the Canadian military shocked MPs on Thursday by testifying that the Department of Veterans Affairs offered her, in writing, the opportunity for a medically assisted death — and even offered to provide the equipment.

“I have a letter saying that if you’re so desperate, madam, we can offer you MAID, medical assistance in dying,” said Gauthier who first injured her back in a training accident in 1989. Testifying in French, she said she has been fighting for a home wheelchair ramp for five years and expressed her concerns about the assisted dying offer in a recent letter to Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

“I sent a letter to Prime Minister Trudeau and that they [Veterans Affairs] offered me MAID and would supply equipment,” said Gauthier.

So, if anyone would like to let us know about not having received their books yet… Seriously, though, this is such a tragedy that it makes me genuinely sad. If only Douglas Adams had lived to see this day.

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Disney Doubles Down

I wish I could have seen the Dark Herald’s face when he learned that Disney is bringing Bob Iger back as CEO:

Former Disney boss Bob Iger, who headed the entertainment giant for 15 years, is returning to lead the firm. He replaces Bob Chapek, who took over as chief executive in February 2020. Disney shares have fallen by more than 40% this year and the company has poured billions of dollars into its loss-making streaming service Disney+.

Mr Iger’s decision to step down in 2020 came as a surprise, after he had driven several major takeovers and launched Disney’s streaming network.

Susan Arnold, who heads the company’s board, said in a statement that Mr Iger was “uniquely situated” to take Disney through “an increasingly complex period of industry transformation.”

Mr Iger has agreed to hold the post for two years in which time he aims to find a successor to lead the company.

“I am extremely optimistic for the future of this great company and thrilled to be asked by the Board to return as its CEO,” Mr Iger said.

During his decade and a half as chief executive Disney bought animation studio Pixar, comic book company Marvel, the home of Star Wars LucasFilm and Rupert Murdoch’s 21st Century Fox.These deals, along with the launch of the Disney+ streaming platform and amusement park openings helped the company’s market value increase five-fold during his time in charge…

Disney now has more than 235 million subscriptions across its three streaming platforms, which also include the sports-focused ESPN+ and wider entertainment site Hulu. Netflix, by comparison, has about 223 million subscribers. Mr Chapek also faced pressure over his response to Florida’s controversial “Don’t Say Gay” bill.

Here is my prediction. Iger will not only double down on Disney’s convergence, he will also attempt to buy Netflix. Growth through leveraged buyout is the only thing he knows, and the seeds of future failure are always planted in the flowering of success.

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Is it Time for Twitter to Go?

Never forget, the Jews never did nothing to nobody, they have absolutely no power or influence in the United States or anywhere else, they’re just as good Christians as any other church-going American, and anyone who is less than entirely enthusiastic about not living under their totally benign and selfless not-influence is full of hate for absolutely no reason whatsoever.

It’s ironic, Jonathan, but I suspect more than a few irrational, hate-filled Americans are thinking exactly the same thing about you and your defamation league. For absolutely no reason at all.

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Once is an Accident

Twitter just alerted employees that effective immediately, all office buildings are temporarily closed and badge access is suspended. No details given as to why.
5:52 PM, 17 November 2022

Mauvais just addressed Twitter on her debut for DLN. Coincidence? Maybe…

DARK LORD NEWS

UPDATE: Elon Musk is set to lose 75 percent of his remaining workforce after hundreds resigned following his 5pm ET deadline for employees to get ‘hardcore’ Musk sent an email to staff on Wednesday telling them to either commit to ‘long hours at high intensity’ or quit with three months severance.

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Wakanda Never

The Dark Herald steels himself and reviews Wakanda Forever in substantial detail. It’s not an easy job, but someone has to do it.

I feel like such a chump.

I honestly thought Marvel was going to try for once. I have no idea what this unfounded optimism was based on.

Most of the praise for this film was written by shills before it hit the theaters. You can tell.

Although, I have seen legitimate good reviews for this movie, and they were entirely from fat Gamma Males. If you are a Fat Gamma Male or are simply a Gamma male who is fat in spirit, this is absolutely the film for you. You will cry like the bitches you were born to be throughout the whole thing.

If you are a Delta and above, you will curse the goddess of whatever fate that pronounced the doom upon your head that forced you into a theater to endure this impenetrable wall of tedium.

Fortunately, the movie theater I went to serves drastically overpriced beer. Bless you, oh Founder’s Dirty Bastard Scottish ale ABV 8.5%, I couldn’t have made it without you.

I strongly suspect this script was mostly finished before Chadwick Boseman died because he was mad as hell with Disney about something before he clocked out. It feels like it was extensively reworked. Some things just don’t fit like they should. It is possible that this script was originally supposed to take place during The Snap after T’Challa got zilched out for five years. That would make more sense than the complete lack of political adjustments being made when T’Challa was…let’s face facts…dead after Thanos’ little visit.

When T’Challa Blipped back in, he should have seen Gorilla Dude sitting on his throne being unhappy to see him. Although Gorilla Dude was undoubtedly less happy to be in this movie given that he was portrayed as being stupider than a gorilla.

Regardless, a story about his family adjusting to King T’Challa being gone would only make sense if they hadn’t already just gone through it. They are acting like they are mourning him for the first time and we all know he just spent five years being dead.

I would have to assume that you were hopelessly incompetent as a scriptwriter to have deliberately designed a story like this. This is not an assumption that I can casually dismiss with Marvel in the 2020s.

The oppressed minorities in this movie are constantly snarling about “colonizers.” WHY? Neither Wakanda nor the Sea-Mayans were ever colonized. And if the Wakandans were so morally outraged about the slave trade… Why. Didn’t. They. Do. Anything. About. It?

If Wakanda is three hundred years ahead of everyone else then I am pretty sure, my 18th-century ancestors would not have been willing to pursue the slave trade in face of 20th-century weaponry.

Read the whole thing there. In related news, the Devil Mouse is losing money. A LOT of money.

The Walt Disney Company is expected to make massive layoffs due to their poor financial outlook. As per a memo sent to top company execs last Friday and subsequently viewed by Variety, the House of Mouse will begin taking substantial measures to offset the company’s recent and abysmal Q4 financial losses.

This year, production spending for the Marvel Cinematic Universe hit an all-time high with both both Thor: Love & Thunder as well as Black Panther: Wakanda Forever hitting $250 million in costs before marketing – the highest such budgets for a non-Avengers film in the entire franchise. The massive costs of the film have driven Marvel Studios’ average break-even mark for those films to be an estimated $700-800 million dollars.

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The Price of Social Justice Sensitivity

This example from Australia isn’t corporate cancer so much as fatal corporate plutonium irradiation.

Cheer Cheese used to be called Coon, named after its founder, Edward William Coon. “Coon” is slang for abo, so for years cultural marxist activists pressured Coon to change its name.

In 2020 Coon caved and changed its name to Cheer. And then for no reason at all, people stopped buying their products:

The Canadian dairy behind Cheers cheese will close one of its Australian factories and sack up to 75 workers after major financial losses and milk supply issues. Saputo has announced it will close its Maffra factory in the Gippsland region of Victoria, less than a decade after it bought back the brand in 2015. The company will also reduce the capacity of its bulk powders production facility in Leongatha, southeast of Melbourne and the cheese packaging facility at Mil-Lel in South Australia.

Saputo Australia reported a $54.4m annual loss for the 12 months to March 31 – a stark difference to the $30.6m net profit in 2021.

$81 million in profit vaporized in one year thanks to corporate convergence. At this point, Corporate Cancer is probably one of the ten most important business books ever published. It might even be top five. And yet, virtually no one in the global corpocracy has read it, so clueless executives will continue to listen to the blandishments of their converged Diversity and Human Resources departments and nuke their own company’s financials as a result.

What could it hurt, they said. No one could possibly mind, they said. It’s just a little name change, they said…

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Twitter Flirts with Bankruptcy

The rapid decline of Twitter is the result of a false foundation on free money and fake advertisers rather than user-subscriptions.

At least six executives have reportedly resigned from Twitter this week. The social media platform’s new owner, Elon Musk, called an all-hands meeting on Thursday, announcing a return to office hours and mentioning the possibility of bankruptcy unless the company can find a way to become profitable.

Among the departures was the head of safety and moderation, Yoel Roth, Bloomberg reported, citing insider sources. Musk had kept Roth on despite complaints from conservatives that he had been responsible for much of the political censorship on the platform – one of the reasons the Tesla and SpaceX CEO cited for buying the company.

“The economic picture ahead is dire,” Musk wrote in an email calling the meeting, according to the New York Times. “Without significant subscription revenue, there is a good chance Twitter will not survive the upcoming economic downturn.”

Unless Twitter can generate profits from its $8 monthly Blue program, bankruptcy is a very real possibility, Musk reportedly said, adding that the platform is currently too dependent on advertising.

All of the social media giants are, to greater and lesser degrees, fraudulent corporate structures. They are not actually real businesses as one learns about business in business school or Econ 101. Their nominal customers are not their customers, but rather, their “advertisers”, who are not actually advertisers as one is taught in Marketing 101, but Clown World conduits for free money provided to ticket-takers. They are totally – and I mean TOTALLY – dependent upon a constant flow of external “investment” money. In most cases, the total “investment” into them far exceeds their actual revenue.

For example, Patreon’s peak monthly payout, in July 2022, is $26 million. Since they take an average of 6 percent, this means their average monthly revenue is around $1.6 million. Ergo, their peak annual revenue is around $20 million and their total lifetime revenue from 2013 is around $60 million, while as of one year ago, Patreon had received $413.3 million in funding over 10 rounds. This strongly suggets that Patreon is not, and never will be, a viable business under its current revenue model. The same is true of Twitter and other public companies propped up by various forms of “investment”; rising interest rates and falling stock prices mean that the flow of money these corporations require to operate is beginning to dry up.

This is why UATV and Arktoons have been subscription-based from the start. And this is why it is so important to subscribe to at least one service, because it is the only foundation that is real and capable of keeping things going over an extended period of time.

As a community, we have an amazing opportunity here. The corporate fakes and frauds that have siphoned up all of the public awareness by providing “free” services are beginning to crumble. As with the Great Depression, the giants of the 2060s and beyond will be the agile and determined operations that survived and thrived during the Great Collapse.

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The Free Money Stopped

Now Facebook is planning to fire even more workers than Twitter did:

Just over a week ago, Meta CFO Dave Wehner confidently stated that the not-so-giant tech firm will basically freeze headcount and limit new hiring…

With the shares down 36% since then (and is down over 70% this year), something has apparently changed extremely fast.

The Wall Street Journal reports that, according to people familiar with the matter, Meta is planning to begin large-scale layoffs this week. As of the last earnings, Meta had over 87,000 employees (and has never seen a quarterly decline in headcount in its 18 year history)…

The WSJ sources say that layoffs are expected to affect many thousands of employees and an announcement is planned to come as soon as Wednesday, with company officials having already told employees to cancel non-essential travel beginning this week.

Many thousands….

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