James Bond is Gay

We just didn’t realize it until Daniel Craig protested way too much:

Daniel Craig, the current James Bond, gave a long-winded explanation that he has always frequented gay bars from the time he was young, because he likes the fact they are free of the testosterone in regular bars, where he always got into fights and brawls, plus girls go to gay bars, and so he had an ulterior motive in going there, because he is so into women. The reason for the whole exposition was, he was seen in a photo kissing another man in a gay bar. He explained that was just him and the guy joking around, they had been hanging out as bros and were having a little fun pretending to be be gay. In a gay bar.

So, Daniel Craig is secretly gay, is married to a satanist, and isn’t leaving any of “his” money to his children. Assuming, of course, that they are actually his children. If you ever wanted to know how to identify a ticket-taker, he’s a pretty good starting point.

I was on an openly gay record label in the ’90s, and no one at Wax Trax! was as obviously and conclusively gay as that “explanation” provided by Daniel Craig. It’s gayer than the Electric Six song. That’s not an explanation, that’s a self-outing.