Author: VD

”I voted for what I thought was best for the country. Did I expect Howard Dean to go off to the left and say, ‘I’m against everything’? Sure. Did I expect George Bush to fuck it up as badly as he did? I don’t think anybody did.”

– Senator John Kerry, Democratic presidential candidate

I’m really starting to enjoy this election cycle. The Democratic candidates are imploding like frogs with firecrackers inserted inappropriately. It’s like Nine Little Indians, except that it’s funny instead of frightening. What with Lieberman and the jelly doughnut threat, Kucinich’s dating reality show, Dean being Dean and now this, we may get that dream ticket of Dean-Sharpton for which everyone with a sense of humor is hoping. I thought Kerry had hit the height of his absurdity when he went on Leno wearing that stupid leather jacket, but this is even better. We’re reaching Perot-Stockton levels of unintended humor here. I just wish that he’d posed for a matching photo sticking his tongue out and making devils horns.

Dude, that would have been too radical! You totally would have gotten the “rock” vote! Of course, the only zeros who a) think it’s cool to talk like that, and b) vote, are on the UT Issues Committee – or were on the committee until recently – and are probably Deanie weenies anyhow.

Rock,

Vox

The Sports Guy: “it’s like comparing Jessica Biel to Jessica Alba. Hey, you’re fine with Jessica Biel. She may even appear in a few All-Star Games. But Jessica Alba … good Lord.”

I’m so disappointed in Mr. Simmons. He has it exactly backwards. Clearly, he’s still recovering from the Grady Little affair. But this next bit doesn’t surprise me at all, since I happen to be on a mailing list of more than a little interest to Mr. Curt Schilling.

“I’m a longtime member of SOSH, a den for diehards that weeds out weaker members and has 250-post threads on subjects like “Does Casey Fossum’s delivery point seem different to you?” and “One Man’s Thoughts on Nomar’s Last 500 At-Bats, In Order.”… An admitted internet junkie hoping to get a handle on Sox fans, Schilling couldn’t have picked a better place. He stumbled into a SOSH chat room at 2:30 in the morning and found about 20 fans in there, which is my favorite part of the story — only the guys from SOSH would be chatting about the Sox at 2:30 A.M. on Thanksgiving night. After he introduced himself, they verified his identity with a barrage of questions, then spent the rest of their time pleading for him to come to Boston. He ended up staying in the chat room past 4 o’clock, talking about anything and everything. I’m not making this up.”

Hope Curt gets his Cy Young in Boston. The World Series? Well, let’s face it. For the rest of the world, the failure to win a World Series is a lot more amusing.

In reference to increasing discrimination against Christians, David Limbaugh writes: “I continue to encounter liberals who pooh-pooh the idea that it is even possible to discriminate against a majority group.”

I imagine the Shiite majority in Iraq would be able to explain the concept to these benighted, unimaginative folk. If they couldn’t do it, then I’m sure the Islamic majority in Algeria would be happy to. Perhaps I should put it in terms the Left can understand. Why are there no openly Baptist character on prime time television, despite the fact that there are more Baptists (12%) than blacks (11%) in the United States, much less homosexuals. By every left-liberal standard, this is horrendous discrimination and must be immediately addressed with a proper quota.

Just slip an Advil in their bookbag every day. Eventually, someone will find it, and then the school will get the blame, not you.

“How big is she going to get,” I asked Space Bunny. “Oh, around 70 pounds.” Okay, a little bigger than her much-loved Rottweiler cross who we lost to a car two years ago, but not too much. I can deal with it. She took her Delicate Little Flower to the vet yesterday – 83 pounds of very athletic muscle.

Fortunately, she’s very sweet, though her bark sounds as if it begins somewhere down around the 6th circle of Hell. It’s always amusing to answer the doorbell and see the deliverymen standing 15-20 feet from the door. She’s pretty, too, for a linebacker of a dog that looks as if it could eat a Doberman for breakfast.

After the University of Tennessee administration called the cops on the UT College Republicans, check out what their advisor had to say:



“That evening, Michael Combs, the faculty advisor for the College Republicans and a member of the UT Board of Trustees sent an email to their chairman, saying, “I ask that you rescind this call for parents, family, etc., to contact their state representatives. Such action would do far more harm than any good to the university or to your cause. I also sincerely request that you not make direct contact to media outside the campus since this seems to be an internal campus issue at this point. While the media will love to use a good story to sell their papers, going to them with this concern will resolve nothing.

It’s kind of hard to win when your coach is playing for the other team. That’s right, CRs, if someone in authority mistreats you, suck it up and hold your tongue. Because that’s worked so well for so many people in the past. Funny, but it seems that things only started happening AFTER the CRs went to the media. How on Earth could that possibly be?

We are not in a war with a crook in Haiti. This is no Grenada or Panama – or even a Kosovo or Bosnia. No, we are in a worldwide struggle the likes of which we have not seen since World War II. The quicker we understand that awful truth, and take measures to defeat rather than ignore or appease our enemies, the quicker we will win. In a war such as this, the alternative to victory is not a brokered peace, but abject Western suicide and all that it entails – a revelation of which we saw on September 11.

And here we all thought that World War III would be fought against the Soviets.

I don’t have an opinion on the matter, not having enough information, but there sure are far too many unanswered questions about 9/11. I have no doubt that the official histories of TWA 800 and the Oklahoma City bombing are completely false, and I won’t be shocked if the same thing turns out to be true here. I will never, ever understand politicians.

I think I’m glad about that.

Want to know how the Consumer Price Index is kept so ridiculously low? It’s pretty simple, thanks to Mogambo. Housing accounts for 22 percent of the CPI. Home prices are not included in the CPI, although housing rents – which have been declining thanks to historically low mortgage rates and an unusually high percentage of home ownership – are. Furthermore, the CPI assumes that everyone rents, even though 65 percent of households own their own home.

So, you see, if you simply don’t count the prices that are increasing rapidly, and you also multiply by three things which are declining in price, you can make it look as if there is only moderate price inflation of around 3 percent, even as $80 billion per month is created, borrowed and pumped into the economy. On an annual basis, that would require 9.23 percent growth of a $10.4 trillion economy just to stay even, but not even the fabulists who concocted the 8.2 percent growth claim were willing to go that far and claim that a mature economy was growing at a rate rivalling the New Asian Tigers during their explosive heyday.

I have said it before. I will say it again. GOVERNMENT STATISTICS ARE FICTION! Ideally, they would be published in the dark fantasy genre.

Vox Popoli: The Mogambo Guru for President in 2004 HQ

John Curry writes a letter to WND: I’ve heard homosexuals say, “A person who speaks out most against homosexuality is a person who would really deep down like to share that experience and would probably enjoy it”. No one speaks out against that lifestyle more than I. If what they say is true, then their lifestyle must be a choice since I’ve chosen not to do it in all of my 54 years.

Every single time – okay, both times – I’ve written a column even tangentially related to homosexuality, I’ve been accused of being queer myself. As Mr. Curry points out, were this true, it would simply prove that homosexual behavior is a choice, and an easily controlled one at that. Of course, I’ve yet to hear from an offended group as utterly devoid of logic as the queer crowd. I can’t even get offended by the attacks; it’s like being mauled by declawed kitten.

Hissy Queer: “How dare you say that being gay is bad! You’re bad! Gay is good! You’re gay! Homophobe! You’re secretly gay!”

Me: “Do you even listen to yourself?”

One of these days I’ll dig up an old email from the gentleman who describes himself as the father of the gay rights movement, apparently unaware of the irony, and post it here. His strategy, if you can even call it that, consists of the assertion that homosexuality is a positive good, in all ways. According to him, it is healthier than being normal, more morally pure than being normal, more ethical, etc. Which naturally makes one wonder what color the sky in his world might be. Lavender, most likely.

The other common homosexual response to criticism – aside from the inevitable butchery of language involved in the assertion of “homophobia” – is to assert that the critic is jealous. Jealous, I ask, of what? Disease, a proclivity for suicide and bad dance music? Sounds like a real party, Penelope.