England 2, Norway 1

I think England deserved to win the game. They were the better team. And I don’t think the disallowed goal on the corner was a problem, nor do I think there was an issue on the build-up to the England goal where the ball may or may not have touched a TV drone wire or whatever. That being said:

Harry Kane and Jed Spence should have both received yellow cards for simulation. And it was definitely not a penalty; Spence stuck his leg out to draw contact, then threw himself down. Now, to be clear, I have despised Harry Kane for years and consider him to be a blight on the beautiful game. About 75 percent of his game involves falling down and appealing for a free kick or penalty; you can see him literally lifting up his legs and diving every time he imagines he was touched. Sometimes he even points his toes. He’s the anti-Haaland and the biggest cheat in international football since Pippo Inzaghi was going down like he was shot in the back of the head against Turkey. So I thought it was hilarious that Norway scored its first goal in part because Kane was too busy diving instead of putting pressure on the guy who stole the ball and preventing him from sending the cross that turned into an inadvertent shot and goal.

Norway should have gotten a penalty on a later corner kick, the one that bounced around, hit the crossbar, and nearly went in. After it hit the crossbar, a Norwegian player went up to head it in and took a forearm shiv to the back of the neck from the defender behind him that knocked him down. That wasn’t just a foul and a penalty, it was an obvious yellow card. Any statistical analysis will show that about 99 percent of the fouls called on corners are called on the attacking team, which is totally absurd. And yet, the same VAR review that correctly disallowed Norway’s goal for Haaland’s push did nothing when a defender threw a Muy Thai elbow strike.

Jude Bellingham was great. It’s amazing that despite all the skill, talent, and money, the guy scores because he follows his teammate’s shots just like every schoolboy player is taught, unlike every other player on both teams.

Norway’s right wing needs a shock collar. He repeatedly refused to pass the ball to Haaland in scoring opportunities. There’s no excuse for that when Haaland is literally the team’s entire offense. If he makes those three passes in the first half, Norway very likely would have won the game.

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