Portrait of a Promethean

It’s obvious that Princess Nut Nut, the 3rd and current wife of the British Prime Minister, was being groomed for greater things from a young age despite her complete incompetence and inability to even show up at her job.

The source recalls that Lewis was soon made aware of concerns about Carrie’s work ethic. ‘A lot of people hadn’t been happy about her behaviour for quite a long time,’ they say.

‘She just wasn’t up to the job. She was never in the office at CCHQ. She was missing in action all the time.’

One source remembers: ‘Zac [Lord Goldsmith, a friend of Carrie] and Sajid [Javid] contacted Brandon Lewis and asked him not to get rid of Carrie. They lobbied for her to stay.’

But Lewis alone was not involved in deciding her future. Sir Mick Davis, the Tory Party’s chief executive, was a prime mover.

Insiders say that Sir Mick ran his section like a business. He was in charge of spending and salaries and, like any good businessman, he wanted to be sure that the party was getting value for money.

He was aware of two principal areas of concern. The first was Carrie’s commitment to her job as director of communications. The second related to the amount of expenditure she had incurred in taxi journeys that had been charged to CCHQ.

Under a long-standing arrangement, CCHQ had an account with a minicab firm. Taxis could be booked by staff using a password. The name of whoever made the booking would be logged by the firm.

It transpired that some journeys had been booked by Carrie for use in her private time. Not only that, but these bookings had been made using the names of junior members of staff without their knowledge, to disguise the fact that they were for Carrie….

Carrie’s habit of peppering her social-media accounts with bulletins of where in the world she was at any given time had, seemingly, begun to catch up with her. It’s said in the past decade, she notched up at least 40 work or leisure trips abroad and in Britain. In the first six months of 2014, for example, she made visits with friends and colleagues to Dublin, Morocco, the Cotswolds, Spain, Vienna and Moldova.

‘There were quite a few times when I wondered where she was and I was just told she was ‘off’,’ recalls one former colleague who worked alongside her at the Department for Culture, Media and Sport. ‘She didn’t seem to come in very often and when I asked after her, I was told that she had a headache or was on holiday.’

Other work or holiday destinations over the years included Venice, St Tropez, Rome, the Cayman Islands, Portugal, Mustique, Sri Lanka, Lebanon, Croatia, Vienna, Barbados, Greece, Tuscany, Germany, Paris and New York.

Even some Conservative MPs commented on the frequency with which she seemed to be away.

‘Delighted you’ve made it to another country for a rare change,’ wrote Paul Scully jokingly after she posted a photograph on Instagram of a beautiful Greek beach. ‘You need to get away a bit more, Carrie,’ added Nigel Adams.

‘The absence issue was quite something,’ says another source. ‘We all got the same amount of annual leave – 25 days – and her social media was looked at. ‘It was very clear that she was off more than she should have been. And she was earning a decent salary. It was about £80,000. That was very good for someone of her age and experience, which was limited actually to CCHQ and some spad [special adviser] jobs. She had very little employment experience outside Westminster.’

The source adds: ‘Sir Mick soon realised her appointment had been an error, and she was the wrong choice.’

Due to the fact that a non-disclosure agreement was eventually signed between Carrie and CCHQ, it is unclear precisely when and why the situation exploded, but it did. That Carrie is said to have spent thousands of pounds on taxis using other people’s names cannot have helped matters.

Some of Carrie’s former colleagues remain deeply unimpressed by the taxi episode to this day.

One says: ‘She’s lucky she didn’t end up in more serious trouble. I think it’s only because of where she worked that nobody wanted to draw more attention to it. It was misuse of CCHQ funds. She used the names of those just starting out on their careers. That was unforgivable.’

Not a word was leaked to the press at the time about her being forced to quit. Shortly afterwards she took up a post with Oceana, a charity that protects and restores oceans.

Never, ever, give a single dime to any charity organization. They’re nothing more than revenue nets run primarily for the benefit of the people who populate their bureaucracies.