A noble cause

DALLAS, TX – January 2nd, 2001 – In a move that has millions across the Internet community frowning, Despair, Inc. today announced that the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office (USPTO) had awarded them a registered trademark for the ‘frowny’ emoticon which serves as their logo.

At a press conference, Despair’s COO, Dr. E.L.Kersten, announced his intentions to sue “anyone and everyone who uses the so-called ‘frowny’ emoticon, or our trademarked logo, in their written email correspondence. Ever.”

A great and well-worthy endeavor.

Silence the hordes of would-be clever!

Those madcap dogs, wearing down upon

Us with their Hell-spawned emoticon