Tag: sports

Isner has won the longest match in tennis history, taking the fifth set against Nicolas Mahut 70-68. The first-round match at Wimbledon took 11 hours, 5 minutes over three days. Isner closed out the victory Thursday with a backhand winner, then collapsed to his back as he tossed his racket in jubilation and relief.

Isner won 6-4, 3-6, 6-7 (7), 7-6 (3), 70-68.

Forget Joe Dimaggio’s 56-game hitting streak. And Barry Bond’s home run rec*rd. Isner-Mahut’s epic 70-68 fifth set is going to outlast them both. I don’t really have anything to say about it, except that it’s deeply awesome.

USA 1, Algeria 0. The refereeing was really shocking, with the disallowal of a SECOND valid US goal. And Altidore was frankly horrendous, losing balls unnecessarily and shooting 10 yards over an empty net from five yards out. But Landon Donovan came through in injury time to permit the USA to claim the group. England will go through as well with a 1-0 win over Slovenia, but they don’t look to be long for the tournament.

We have a German friend coming over tonight and we’ll definitely be cheering for Germany, as the USA should be able to get past Serbia without too much trouble – assuming the referees will swallow their ridiculous whistles – if the Germans can claim their group.

I could not figure out what in the name of the 18th Fructidor French manager Raymond Domenech was doing naming Nicolas Anelka to Les Blues, let alone STARTING him. Anelka isn’t quite as bad as Emile Heskey, (word out of the England camp is that Fabio Capelli has finally given up on starting him), but he’s only scored 14 goals in 64 games for one of Europe’s elite teams. Contrast that with Andriy Shevchenko’s 45 goals in 94 games for Ukraine, Gabriel Batistuta’s 56 goals in 78 games for Argentina, or more importantly, Thierry Henry’s 51 goals in 122 games for France.

Given that record of poor performance, one can’t doubt the wisdom of the French Football Federation to kick Anelka off the team and send him home given his behavior during the French loss to Mexico.

“It’s shocking, because if anyone has protected Anelka, it’s Domenech. Domenech has played Anelka throughout the past two years” — vice president of the French Football Federation, Noel le Graet, after taking the decision to send Nicolas Anelka home immediately.

“Go f–k yourself, you dirty son of a b—h” — what Anelka said to Raymond Domenech (shortly after the coach told him to stop moving out of position, and shortly before being subbed off against Mexico) to get himself into hot water.

For some reason, many soccer managers cannot seem to distinguish between African athletes and African strikers. The only thing that real strikers like Eto’o, Drogba, and Henry have in common with athletes who happen to be assigned an attacking position like Heskey and Anelka is that they are of African descent. If a striker cannot maintain at least a 25% scoring rate per game, he should not be starting and probably shouldn’t even be on the team barring the possession of a particular support skill.

I was a little surprised to see Cameroon lose to Denmark, who was amazingly careless in back. The Dutch had some trouble with the Japanese discipline, but did enough to win and go through with a game to spare, and Australia would do well to hire a new manager who is capable of explaining the rules of the game to the Socceroos. Kewell’s handball in the box wasn’t the worst I’ve seen, or the most inexplicable, but it clearly merited the whistle given the tight way this tournament is being called.

“A proper-functioning strip club is a place for a mature man of wealth to help a young woman work through her daddy issues.”
– Maurice Honey aka the Man Who Saved the NFL

I have no sympathy for Germany. Miroslav Klose’s card was for stupidity more than anything else. Yes, the Spanish ref is calling a strict game, but as a player, you have a responsibility to pay attention to that. Klose had already been whistled twice for tackles from behind and verbally warned about it, then went ahead and committed two more fouls in exactly the same manner.

UPDATE: 1-0 to Serbia. The Germans were literally handed an opportunity to tie the game after a Serbian defender committed the most inexplicable handball I have ever seen in more than three decades of soccer, but Podolsky’s weak penalty shot was saved by the keeper. The German defeat casts an even harsher light on Australia’s feeble performance in the first game.

UPDATE II: An absolutely shameful call by the referee to disallow the USA’s third goal. FIFA has done an excellent job in forcing the side judges to stop calling phantom offsides, now they need to stop the referees from calling phantom fouls in the box. The only fouls being committed were by the Slovenian players. Absurd. The USA well-merited the three points by fighting back from a two-goal deficit, but now it will be necessary to beat Algeria if they’re going to qualify. Fortunately, they would appear to have the fortitude to do exactly that.

A few emailers have chastised me and demanded MORE SOCCER POSTS. So, how can I deny them. First, I have to admit that I haven’t watched all of the games, but only the ones that interested me. So, I have nothing to say about Slovenia-Algeria, New Zealand-Slovakia or Côte d’Ivoire-Portugal. Here’s what I’ve noticed thus far:

South Africa is, as I thought in the first game, pretty terrible. They’re okay technically, but have literally no clue what they’re doing tactically. France is not a French team, it is an African team in French uniforms and their manager Domenech is dreadful. It wouldn’t shock me if they lost to Mexico and failed to make the second round. Uruguay is a decent team, but South Africa made them look better than they are. If the Mexicans bother to show up this time, they have a good shot at beating France.

Greece is as boring as ever but now they don’t have a keeper upon whom they can ride to the second round as they did in winning Euro 2004. Argentina will be dangerous once Messi stops getting cute and starts shooting the ball at the goal instead of trying to nip the corners. In the meantime, they should be feeding the ball more to Unfrozen Caveman Striker. It drives me crazy when strikers insist on aiming for the corners, shooting wide, and depriving their team of rebound goals, which make up around one-quarter of all goals scored. Nigeria isn’t getting talked up as the Great African Hope for once in light of South Africa, but I don’t think they can hope to play with South Korea. I very much like the way the South Koreans play; they’re aggressive, fit, and disciplined. They’re not going to beat the Argentines, but they should take second.

There’s not much to say about Group C. It’s England, USA, and that’s about it. Slovenia might surprise one of them with a draw, but I’d expect both teams to win their next two games. Group D is Germany and the three dwarfs. The Netherlands are easily the class of their group, as they toyed with the Danes throughout. I expect the Japanese to finish second in Group E behind the Dutch; their 1-0 game against Cameroon wasn’t as close as the score indicates.

Both Italy and Brazil looked relatively bad against Paraguay and North Korea, the difference was that the Brazilian strikers are better. Italy should be starting Camorenesi on the wing; the game turned around when he came in. Buffon’s injury really hurts the Azzurri, but an Italian team that is counting on its goalie is not an Italian team that is in contention anyhow. Portugal is a shadow of its former self and I join the rest of the world in hoping for an embarrassing injury to Cristiano Ronaldo. Irina Shayk may be no little hot, but not even a Sports Illustrated girlfriend can hope to counterbalance that ubercheesy cheeseball, his whining and all those needless stepovers. Speaking of annoyances, I thought the Brazilians were infuriating; they kept trying to unlock the North Korean defense by passing around the ball outside the box instead of sending it in for crosses against a very short defense. Like the South Koreans, the North Koreans outperform their talent. I had the idea that the Brazilians felt sorry for them, Lucio in particular appeared to be going out of his way to pat them on the back or otherwise encourage them.

And finally, Hop Schwiiz! The Swiss defeat of Spain wasn’t a big surprise to me because the temperamental, individual-centered Spanish attack is very vulnerable to the Swiss catenaccio strategy. I fully expect Switzerland to win the group now; the loss of Alexander Frei was never the big deal that everyone appear to have assumed it would be. In fact, they’re better off without him making their attack overly one-dimensional. Torres was the only Spanish player who looked consistently dangerous; he’s coming back from injury but should be starting anyhow. Some notes:

1. Ban the vuluzelas.
2. I find myself fantasizing about watching the games from the stands with a large caliber sniper rifle and picking off midfielders when they a) refuse to make through passes to a waiting striker with 50 yards of empty grass in front of him, b) pull up and dribble the ball in a circle in transition to permit the defense to get set, c) pass up a perfectly reasonable shot in order to get a slightly better shot that only requires beating two, three, or sometimes four defenders. TAKE THE DAMN SHOT!
3. I hate most midfielders. Just in case that wasn’t clear. If your name isn’t “Zidane”, you are not going to be able to beat more than one international-class defender. Don’t even try.
4. Aside from the terrible red card given to the South African goalie, the red that should have been a yellow given to the one Australian who actually knows how to play soccer, and the second yellow not given to Jamie Carragher for clotheslining a US striker, the refs have been surprisingly good.
5. The ball isn’t the problem with the low scores. They are the result of defense-oriented strategies combined with an extreme reluctance on the part of attackers to shoot the ball if it is more than three meters away from the goal line. Here is hoping the goals scored by Clint Dempsey and Diego Forlan encourage attacking players to shoot more quickly and more often.
6. Managers desperately need to lose their fascination with big, fast physical specimens who can’t score. For example, Emile Heskey has scored 7 goals in 59 games with England. Why in the name of the third lion is he on the team, let alone starting? I would expect to score more goals than that in 59 games, especially playing against powerhouse teams like Kazakhstan and the Faroe Islands.

And for those of you who hate soccer, the Onion has come through again.

Soccer Officially Announces It Is Gay

Korea dominated Greece. Just dominated them. They looked fast, sharp, and capable of pestering the elite teams. I can’t see them winning the group but they should go through easily.

Argentina toyed with Nigeria. It wasn’t anywhere nearly as close as the 1-0 score indicated. Messi was absolutely awful and should have had at least two goals. He was shooting so badly that I kept thinking he was a midfielder.

England was better than the USA throughout, but the USA should have actually won it. The referee showed himself to be England’s 12th man when Jamie Carragher wasn’t given a red card after pulling down the US player by his neck on a through ball at the end of the game. Both teams should go through without any trouble. The US midfield played too defensively for my liking, but the defense was sturdy and did a great job of controlling both Heskey and Rooney.

I thought South Africa was a little better than I expected them to be and Mexico was downright lazy. Neither team has a striker capable of finishing; Mexico in particular was plagued by the dread Midfielder’s Disease. There must have been five or six occasions when a Mexican player passed up the opportunity to make a shot in search of the perfect opening, the defense closed, and the ball was lost without ever a shot being fired. A good result for South Africa and a poor one for Mexico. Based on the talent difference and Mexican control of the ball, it should have been 2-0 or 3-1.

Although Nicola Anelka had one great season for Arsenal about 12 years ago, I have long considered him to be a downright negative. France would have been better playing with 10 players than starting him up front. I’ve never seen a player at the International level ignore more passing opportunities in favor of trying to beat three defenders at once. He’s a physical specimen, fast and strong, and still less than worthless on the pitch. Once the ball went to Anelka, it was as good as turned over to Uruguay. Given the red card, it was a great result for Uruguay and disastrous for France. Even England after Rooney’s injury last time around looked more capable of scoring than this French team.

The quadrennial carnival starts tomorrow and it promises more excitement off the pitch than on it. Here are my predictions:

1) The USA upsets England and wins Group C.
2) The number of World Cup-related deaths in South Africa exceeds the number of goals scored.
3) South Africa will not get past the group stage.
4) Australia will finish last in Group D after being upset by Ghana.
5) The Italians will argue vociferously over which strikers should be starting and who was substituted too soon/late. Before and after every game.
6) Holland will finally claim the Cup.