A woman in the UK rather amusingly explains the downside of going public with the quotidian vagaries of one’s marriage.
- Shocking: Couple argues and doesn’t immediately split. Experts baffled.
- A source close to the situation (me) said: She was hormonal, ill, and momentarily lost the plot. She now regrets turning to Instagram for validation instead of paracetamol and a nap.
- A source close to the situation (also me) has confirmed: I was deeply offended by the audacity of her husband going out whilst she had what felt like the plague in a moment of weakness, she turned to social media.
- She now regrets this. Not the rage – just the post.
- Another close source (me) says tensions peaked during a fever dream. The woman regrets posting to Instagram but maintains her husband was being a bit of a t**. The goats remain neutral. No further statements will be issued.
In fairness, I’ve survived the plague myself. Twice. Or at least imagining that I had the plague, when in fact I only had a fever sufficient to produce hallucinations. Twice. But fever-induced imaginary plague is no joke, and it’s the sort of thing that a victim’s spouse really needs to take more seriously than they often have a tendency to do just because it is imaginary.
We fever-induced imaginary plague survivors really need a ribbon.