Mailvox: the charity war

Phoenician presents a fascinatingly ironic defense of McRapey:

Your attempt to smear him is a joke, and you’re a joke, you twerp – and what you don’t get is now you’re an even bigger joke known to many, many people who had no clue you existed.  Scalzi has pwned you. You might as well drop your pants, paint your ass red, and bend over.

So he can do what, gently massage my gluteal muscles?  Surely Phoenician doesn’t mean to suggest McRapey would, you know, sexually assault someone!  It appears that Mr. Scalzi’s fans share his public fascination with “cranial-rectal insertions”, “assbags”, and rape.  Now, perhaps I am a joke, an even bigger joke than before, and yet I can’t help but notice that the Dread Ilk appear to be the only ones laughing.  Phoenician, for one, appears to be a good deal more angry than amused.

Here is the question:  If l’affaire McRapey is going so fabulously well for the Gamma Rabbit, why is it only his fans who are urging me to stop?  My readers don’t appear to mind a daily update on the latest gamma antics and one would certainly hate to see the poor little gay black children shortchanged.  Does Phoenician simply hate little gay black girls?  I am absolutely committed to ensuring that they get every last penny of the $50,000$60,000 now pledged to them; I do wish there was an official counter or something to which I could link just to keep track.  In additional to the charitable imperative, I note that not only has Mr. Scalzi never once asked me to stop referring to him as McRapey, but has repeatedly professed his delight at all the attention he is receiving.

I, for one, would be devastated to see the anticipated recipients of such charitable largesse deprived of 95% of what they are expecting.  I expect that even if Mr. Scalzi no longer enjoys the attention, he would be loathe to make any request that would cause them to lose out on $57,000 in donations.  If he genuinely wished me to stop, then surely it would behoove him to simply ask me to do so rather than engage in all of these theatrics.

But what if Phoenician is correct and it is the Gamma Rabbit’s approach that is proving to be the more effective?  In that case, then logic clearly dictates we must follow the man’s charitable example.  Here’s what I’m going to do: From now until the end of 2013 (and
backdating to January 1st), each time John “I am a rapist” Scalzi forces himself on a woman “without their consent or desire and then batter(s) them sexually”, I’m going to put $5 into a pot. At the
end of the year, I’m going to tally it up.  All the money, up to $1,000,
will be donated to Victoria’s Secret, a stripper named Sunshine, a restaurant called The Black Cat, and the Sexual Assault Response Network of Central Ohio.

Nothing is going to stop Gamma Rabbit from doing what rabbits do.  But at least the thought of all that money going to causes the Chief Rabbit of the Whatever warren hates will enrage him to much the same extent that the idea of FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS pledged to Emily, rain, Rainbow Pride, and the Colored People infuriates me.