The Telegraph publishes a helpful list:
HOW TO SPOT A TOXIC WIFE
1 Women who are secure in themselves and have a more developed emotional intelligence and personal depth do not feel the need to show off. Check whether or not she is festooned with ‘designer’ accessories. Listen carefully to what she says. How often does she name-drop?
2 On first acquaintance, she will want to find out if you’re rich or not. If you find yourself discussing your assets within the first 10 minutes you know her agenda. She is not going to waste time on you if you don’t have serious money.
3 She will flirt without first finding out if you’re married or involved with someone else. She has no scruples about stealing another woman’s man.
4 Even though she may have an impressive job, her main asset is sex. She will come on in a highly provocative manner, be wearing lots of make-up and revealing clothes. Potential toxic wives are extremely clever. Do not equate intelligence with emotional values and worth.
5 Often she will use the FSFM tactic (feel sorry for me). This will manifest itself on the second or third date. She wants to assess how generous you can be and will tell you how ”naïve” she is and how “misled” by some nasty people she owes money to.
Although I recommend staying away from career women altogether, if you absolutely insist on dating one such, I’d strongly recommend talking to her co-workers early on in the relationship. If she’s a user who relies on other people, especially men, to cover for her inadequacies, don’t waste a single day in getting out of that relationship.
Actually, this would be beneficial to women as well. You can hide your character from someone you’re dating, at least for a while, but you can’t hide it from people who work with you for more than a short period of time.
In general, if a woman plays damsel in distress, you’d be better off marrying the monster.