Mailvox: praise from on high

It seems Mount Olympus has broadband now, as I received an email:

Howdy Vox,

I just thought I’d let you know how much I enjoyed your post about killing children in My name. I’ll be in touch if I ever need one whacked.

I’ve blogged about your courageous volunteering here.


To which I responded:

Thanks very much indeed. I’ll just be sitting here, sharpening my knives in preparation.


Far be it from me to correct Heavenly reading comprehension, (after all, if God declares the grammatically correct contraction for “is not” to be “ain’t”, we have concluded that “ain’t” it shall henceforth be, have we not), but I respectfully offer a clarification pointing out that I did not write anything about killing anybody in anyone’s name, but rather affirmed the morality of a positive response to an incontrovertible Divine command.

There is a significant difference between the two concepts. If I molest a parakeet, I can claim that I am doing so in Pharyngurl’s name on the basis of his writings on the evolutionary relationship between homo sapiens and aprosmictus erythropterus without Pharyngurl having any idea that anyone is pestering the poultry, much less harboring responsibility for telling me to do it.

And this is very different than Pharyngurl appearing at my door, presenting me with three forms of identification, intentionally misunderstanding the friendly greeting given by the neighbor walking past and pretending to take great offense at it, then holding up a bird cage and saying “molest this parakeet”.

Two different things. One cannot reasonably conflate them.

No parakeets or two-year olds were harmed in the writing of this post.