Ten Things Peter King Doesn’t Think

1. I’m with the Sports Guy. There is only one LT. The excellent running back from San Diego is named LaDainian, not LT.

2. It’s a bad idea to have your fantasy team depend upon a player from your favorite team… unless you’re a Vikings fan and your QB is Daunte Culpepper.

3. The T.O. Philly experiment appears to be off to a good start. Of course, the Giants are terrible this year, so the key word may be “appears”.

4. Do not bind the mouths of the kine that tread whatever it is that they tread. Give Duce Staley the ball on the one-yard line, Bill Cowher! At least once, for Duce’s sake! Yes, I started Duce. And yes, I’m bitter.

5. I’m still not sure Stephen Jackson will supplant Marshall Faulk this year, but 50 yards in his first game is a good sign. Plus, it drives Chokechain nuts. Man, you draft Jackson and DeShaun Foster in the last two rounds and suddenly everyone is calling you Grim Reaper.

6. Tampa looks bad. So bad. It’s nice to see Mr. Gibbs come back with a win and Clinton Portis is still a stud, but this was more about Tampa stinking it up than Washington beating them. If I was a Redskins fan – hi Mom – I’d be nervous about how close that game was.

7. The best W1 fantasy league moment requires a little explanation. I picked Marcus Robinson as a starting WR, but when he got demoted, Chokechain scooped up Nate Burleson from the free agents pool. He was trying to trade Burleson for Stephen Jackson for the last two weeks, (he has Marshall Faulk), but I refused. Burleson comes out of the game, Robinson goes in, Culpepper to Robinson for 3 yards and a TD. I called Chokechain, who’s got The Ticket and was watching with my brother, his first words were: “Yeah, we had an over/under of three minutes on you calling.” Take the under, baby!

8. What happened to the Ravens defense? And is there anything more fun than shouting “I’m a soldier” every time anyone mentions Kellen Winslow? The White Buffalo is already regretting drafting him.

9. Carson Palmer can definitely play. I no longer fear him ruining Chad Johnson’s numbers.

10. Happiness is trailing the defending league champion by one point, with your top draft pick still to play on Tuesday… oops, spoke too soon. Four TDs from Daunte midway through the third quarter and the game is over. 1-0. You can save the scores for next week, Mr. Green!