Tag: women

The Telegraph can’t figure it out:

Why are so many married women having affairs? Gone are the days when adultery was so taboo that affairs generally happened by accident. Now increasing numbers of women set out to stray as if extramarital sex was just one more thing on their to-do list.

It’s hardly rocket science. The decline of religious faith across the West, the expansion of female employment to the middle and upper middle classes, the increase in the average amount of female sexual experience prior to marriage, and the elimination of significant divorce penalties for women have combined to create a generation of women less inclined to take their marital vows seriously than those that preceded them.

In the same way that putting a ring in a bull’s nose doesn’t make it any less a bull, putting a ring on a slut’s finger will not make her any less a slut. Once the narcissistic excitement of All-About-the-Bride Day wears off, the chances are that she’ll return to form. I don’t trust the self-reported statistics that claim 34% of married women are unfaithful, but one would expect female infidelity to exceed male infidelity so long as a) men increasingly seek to avoid marriage and b) the short-term negative post-marital consequences for men significantly exceed those for women. This is why every man contemplating marriage must be very careful to consider his prospective wife’s a) religious dedication, b) desire to work outside the home, and c) sexual history. There are no guarantees, of course, but the cold statistical reality is that some marriages possess higher probabilities of lasting success than others, so if at least two of those three factors are not in operating your favor, you’ll be better off passing and finding another woman.

UPDATE: That being said, it’s not terribly surprising to learn that the science behind the infidelity reports appears to be not so much sub-par as nonexistent. “This survey is so savagely incompetent that I am in awe at how many different media outlets covered it. . . . If a slot machine were as rigged as this survey, the gaming commission would shut down the casino.”

The number of wives and husbands who have ever been unfaithful appears to be in the 15″% to 18% range, which is less than half that commonly reported in the newspapers.

Some women really do think men find high maintenance behavior to be attractive:

Am I alone in thinking there’s something rather magnificent about a woman who can demand (and more importantly, receive) such extravagant devotion? In this egalitarian age of dual incomes, shared bank accounts and recrimination over whose turn it is to empty the dishwasher, there’s something quaintly old-fashioned about any woman who takes such slavish adoration – and the 10-course menu degustation – for granted, with a blithe lack of concern for cost or equality.

This is an exhibit of what is all too common in women, although hardly limited to them: an inability to distinguish between cause and effect. Alpha males do not, as this woman assumes, desire women because they are high maintenance, rather, they desire the sort of women who can get away with being high maintenance because they are exceptionally attractive. And meekly accepting such behavior on the part of a woman is anything but alpha.

It’s similar to the way in which women mistakenly think that because they find social status and money to be a primary determinant in a man’s attractiveness, increasing their social status and income will make them more attractive to men. But it doesn’t work that way; most men will be much more interested in marrying a pretty demure woman who didn’t finish high school than they will to an attractive, successfu, female executive with a degree from Harvard Law and the requisite manjaw.

But give credit where credit is due as the writer gets one thing right. The one thing worse than the openly high maintenance woman is the high maintenance woman who thinks she’s low maintenance.

UK family court law is making sharia look better and better by comparison:

A £56million lottery winner has been ordered to pay £2million to his ex-wife who walked out on him ten years ago. Nigel Page, 44, was sued by his former wife Wendy shortly after his massive Euromillions windfall earlier this year even though she left him for another man.

It is truly astonishing how the Western legal system has rapidly devolved into little more than a vehicle for funneling money from men with resources to women without them. Of course, it’s hard to feel much sympathy for the lottery winner who promptly turned around and married his girlfriend. I wonder what the over/under is on her departure?

A policeman observes the effects of legal inequality in the name of sexual equality:

[A]s a former criminal investigator and street officer I have observed the deadly effects of feminism on women. Many women feel that they are entitled to browbeat, berate, and abuse men without consequences. By rule of law they would be right. By law of nature they often only realize their folly too late. Again and again I have seen this. The couple that has 5 or 10 domestic disturbance calls then one final call.

These aren’t the “burning bed” women. Those women don’t call the police. When that abuse comes to light it is usually a third party that makes the call. The most common is the dysfunctional couple that argue to a fever pitch until the guy has had enough. Often he will try to leave for awhile and she tries to block his exit, as she has not felt adequately satisfied with his level of torment. He removes her from his path, and she calls when he is gone citing that he has attacked her and is out on the road. A very common occurance. On the occasions when we arrive to find both at the home the male will be relatively calm while the female is hysterical or playing hard on the victim card. With the “imminent fear” standard in place women have learned to exploit this feature of the domestic abuse law. I taught rookie officers how to properly make the woman tip her hand to see if she was really in fear. Simply enough, you casually isolate the two parties and tell her that he will not be arrested on this occasion. When they are faking it, the fear act dissolves and you see who the aggressor really is. Not only will she aggress against the male partner but also at the officers.

The present legal situation presents a vicious, downward spiral once a woman makes the unilateral decision that she is the head of the household. There is little point in lamenting the legal realities, as they are what they are and significant change is unlikely until after a) the ongoing economic contraction fundamentally alters the male-female dynamic, or b) Sharia is instituted as is now apparently on the table in places like Amsterdamistan, Londonistan and Oklahoma.

While primary blame must be attached to the woman declares herself queen, there is no shortage of it to be attached to the man who makes the decision, conscious or unconscious, to submit to her rule. Once that decision is made, the possibility of the downward spiral becomes omnipresent; while couples that involve sufficiently low-status men may never embark upon it, some form of negative outcome is nevertheless likely.

Now, it’s not necessary to overreact and decry all possibility of long-term relationships with women simply because the law is stacked in favor of them. That is the instinctive Gamma response and is no different than the way that they tend to exaggerate every Game concept to the point of parodic inutility. All that is really necessary to forestall the likelihood of this downward spiral is to make it clear that although there may be no legal or physical consequences for a woman’s abusive actions, there will be serious repercussions for the relationship. Once a man makes it clear that he would truly rather be dead or working in the bowels of a Patagonian coal mine than live his life being treated badly by the one person who is supposed to be his helpmeet, only a deeply neurotic or psychopathic woman is going to push the issue beyond a few tests to establish his credibility on the matter.

In summary, if you are a browbeaten, hen-pecked man, it is ultimately your fault because you have not only voluntarily chosen that woman, but to accept being treated that way by her as well. It’s not worth it. No real man will ever live that way, and furthermore, as the policeman suggests, you are unlikely to be doing either her or yourself a service with your silence endurance.

If you fail this one, don’t be surprised if the operation turns out to be superfluous:

It’s almost always the woman who suggests a vasectomy, says Duncan Harriss, consultant urological ­surgeon at the Park Hospital, ­Nottingham, who performs vasectomies and vasectomy reversals….. Women are used to being in control of contraception and it’s often difficult to let go of that, even when it’s their husband’s fertility, not their own, in question.

‘The number of vasectomy reversals is increasing and that’s a sign of how relationships are breaking down in this country,’ says Duncan Harriss. He sees five to ten men a week who regret their vasectomy — or, to be more precise, whose wives regret it. ‘The most common situation is that a man has had ­children, had a vasectomy in his 40s and then the relationship has broken down.

Imagine that. Now, I’m not saying that men shouldn’t have vasectomies if they want although I have been told they are much more potentially problematic than most guys tend to assume. But if your wife is demanding that you literally demasculate yourself because she is feeling insecure about the possibility that you might be able to build another family without her, then it is probably safe to go ahead and schedule a few family court appearances, a wedding, and an eventual reversal to go along with the initial operation if you are foolish enough to accede.

Any man who has even the least awareness of Game will understand the disastrous consequences that are likely to result from failing this extreme form of marital s-test.

Ann Althouse succinctly encapsulates why most women are so uninteresting:

Two divorced women went out walking, and what do you think they talked about? Philosophy?

I have to admit, that made me laugh. If there is anything less interesting than a divorcee, of either sex, going on and on about their former spouse more than 10 years post-divorce, it probably has something to do with organic chemistry. And yet I have no doubt that the new Divorce section of the Huffington Post and its aphoristic motto of “His happiness is a small price to pay for my freedom!” will find a large and appreciative female readership.

In reading Althouse’s post, another aphorism insensibly came to mind: “Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” – Eleanor Roosevelt.

Unsurprisingly, Ms Ephron’s narcissistic motto is reflective of the fundamental female miscalculation that leads to so many divorces these days. First, “unhappily married adults who divorced were no more likely to report emotional and psychological improvements than those who stayed married” according to a study entitled “Does Divorce Make People Happy?” Second, even if men don’t become happier after divorce, they are materially better off, whereas the opposite is true for women according to the Institute for Social and Economic Research. “Divorce makes men – and particularly fathers – significantly richer. When a father separates from the mother of his children, according to new research, his available income increases by around one third. Women, in contrast, suffer severe financial penalties. Regardless of whether she has children, the average woman’s income falls by more than a fifth and remains low for many years.”

This is one reason why nearly three times more women are filing bankruptcy than men now. In times of investment booms and expanding wealth, everyone has an economic margin of error and can afford to do stupid things like get divorced for shallow, superficial, and ephemeral reasons. Contractionary times are considerably less forgiving and make it more important to not only have a partner upon whom you can rely, but be a reliable partner yourself as well.

On a tangential note, I suspect that many women would do well to learn from Spacebunny’s understanding that while the male mind is not wholly unconcerned with the lives of those around them, it does tend to be focused on other, more significant matters. By way of example, this morning I told her the extremely exciting news that one heroic lion of technology has ported WinApple to Android! You know what that means, that’s right, the entire Ultima series, starting with Akalabeth, on your phone. And Wizardry. And Swashbuckler. In fact, you might even be able to fit the entire Asimov achive on it! Strangely, she did not react with the celebratory glee and happy dance that one would naturally expect upon learning of such a grand leap forward in the human race’s mobile standard of living. Instead, she responded with little more than an amused smile and a complete non sequitor. “I am totally superfluous in your world.”

Now, what man could fail to love a woman who obviously knows that Call of Duty: Black Ops was released on Monday?

Do you know the story of Snow White? Then surely you remember how the seven dwarves took her in when she was homeless, provided her with food and shelter, and cared so much about her that they shed tears for her and built her a spectacular crystal pedestalbier.

And of course, you will recall that she ran off with Prince Charming at the very first opportunity.

Dwarves are Gammas. Alphas are Prince Charmings. Most men, being Betas and Deltas, fall somewhere in between and therefore face a choice about how to comport themselves in their interactions with the opposite sex. But we can draw two important conclusions from the fairy tale. One, behaving like a dwarf won’t get you the girl. Two, Prince Charming doesn’t stick around to ask twice; if Snow White doesn’t want to get on the horse right away, he rides on without her. It’s a big forest and there are plenty of girls on the girl tree.

If this woman’s lament doesn’t put an amused smile on your face today, well, you’re probably not a man under the age of fifty:

Let me tell you, dear ladies: the age of chivalry is dead.

Yesterday, I drove out of a car park in ­Kensington, London, to find the power-steering on my BMW had gone. The car wouldn’t move. Thankfully, I was in a cul de sac, not a motorway. I stopped and tried to pull over. My car was one foot from the kerb. I put my hazard lights on. Next to me was a building site full of men in fluoro ­jackets standing doing ­nothing. They could see my distress when I began ­peering under the bonnet. I got back in the car, and on my mobile phone to call the BMW breakdown ­service to get the vehicle recovered. I was in tears. Still no one ­bothered to help….

I had thought it was just my ex-husband who used to allow me to put petrol in the car while he sat warm in the passenger seat, but if my ­experience yesterday ­morning is anything to go by, it’s a generational phenomenon. As Top Gear’s James May said this week, young men have lost their masculinity, in that they can no longer fix things. And this loss of manners is far worse. Young working British men: you should be ashamed.

Be ashamed of what? The “f****** cow” is totally in the wrong here. And I wonder, were those nearby men really “doing nothing” or did she simply neither realize nor care how they were occupying themselves thanks to her female solipsism?

Women demanded legal and political equality and our great-grandfathers were foolish enough to grant it to them. So they used that equality to force the last three generations of men to spend between 12 and 16 years being drenched in feminist propaganda about how women were strong, independent, and equal to us, except of course for their intrinsic emotional and moral superiority. Once they had achieved sufficient political power, they then set about redefining the concept of equality in a successful effort to strip men of their legal rights and render them legally inferior in an extra-Constitutional court system where men are guilty until pronounced innocent. And then, after all this, they’re surprised when we don’t treat them like our great-grandfathers treated their great-grandmothers.

I am confident that I speak for many, if not most of the men of my generation in my instinctive response to this woman’s petulant demand that men be at her beck and call: F— you and fix it yourself, Ms Strong Independent Woman. It’s not my problem.

I suspect that these days, the average man is probably more likely to help a male stranger than to help women he doesn’t know. At least a man is likely to have the decency to be grateful and not take your assistance as some sort of rightful homage. As for chivalry being dead, I think it is pertinent to quote Isaac Asimov on the historical conventions of the concept.

“This is Helen as viewed through the eyes of courtly love. By the convention of the troubadours, a woman need not deserve love, she need merely be a woman.” And don’t forget, a woman’s chivalric champion was ideally supposed to be her adulterous lover. It is little wonder, then, that modern women lament chivalry’s death.
(HT: SB)