If they fail biology, it’s probably my fault

“Daddy, what animal are you most scared of?”

“The platypus.”

“The platypus? I thought you were scared of meerkats.”

“Everyone is scared of meerkats.”

“They are? But they’re so cute!”

“That’s just what the meerkats want you to think. They don’t call them the Piranha of the Serengeti for nothing, you know. Even lions are scared of them. They can strip a grown lion to bones in just two minutes.”

“I bet meerkats would be scared of the real piranha, though, in the rivers.”

“Sure. On the land, the meerkats would win. In the water, the piranha would. But the platypus would beat them both, by land, sea, or air.”

“PLATYPUS CAN FLY?”

“Sure, that’s why they’re so scary. They have little jets in their hind legs.”

“But they’re so fat!”

“It’s all muscle.”