President of ESPN resigns

Their executives being on drugs would explain a lot of ESPN’s crazy decisions these last few years. Then again, perhaps what the evil creatures of Disney force their minions to do to keep their jobs requires a considerable amount of self-medication:

ESPN President John Skipper announced Monday he is resigning from the network due to a substance addiction problem.

“I have struggled for many years with a substance addiction. I have decided that the most important thing I can do right now is to take care of my problem,” Skipper said in a statement.

Skipper said he and the company have “mutually agreed” it was appropriate for him to resign. “I come to this public disclosure with embarrassment, trepidation and a feeling of having let others I care about down,” Skipper’s statement continued. “As I deal with this issue and what it means to me and my family, I ask for appropriate privacy and a little understanding.”

Of course, it is not impossible that this is related to the rumored storm in the works, as yesterday’s shut down of the Atlanta airport allegedly was.