Chiefs TE Tony Gonzalez commits without putting his financial future at risk:
Tony Gonzalez is officially off the market. Well, sort of officially. Tony G isn’t getting married, but he is planning a “formal commitment ceremony” on July 20 in Huntington Beach, Calif., where he’ll pledge his love to girlfriend October Russell.
A formal commitment ceremony? That’s so California….
“We’re not signing any papers,” Gonzalez told her, “but I wanted the world to know that I love her and want to spend my life with her. I did it the best way for me.”
I expect we’re going to begin to see a lot more of this sort of thing until American women manage to pressure legislatures into giving them a means of obtaining money from men to whom they were never married. Of course, by that time, the robot sex dolls should be ready to roll.
Alternatively, there’s always the Brad Pitt excuse. “I refuse to get married until everyone can marry whoever they want” sounds so much more noble than “I don’t believe in marriage”. And even if homogamy is unexpectedly legalized, Brad can always nobly refuse to get married until people are permitted to marry chimpanzees, fire hydrants or six additional partners.
He reminds me of Sir Galahad, really.